It has been an eventful couple of weeks. Not so much for the twins, but more for my sanity. After I got the glowing report that my Glucose test looked wonderful I was feeling really pretty good! The day of that glucose appointment the OB doctor wanted to do an ultrasound instead of just a heart doppler, because the twins are so close together, she wanted to make sure she could detect both heart beats. During that ultrasound the sonographer thought she caught a glimpse of a membrane! She saw if for about 3.4 seconds and spent the next 15 minutes looking for it again. All the while, the two little monkeys were moving around like they were at some disco party. After speaking with my OB again, she said she was going to take all of my scans while she was on-call that night and confer with the other specialist downtown and the other OB’s in the office. The confusing part is that I have been classified both: mono mono (momo) and mono di (modi). And she- along with me- wanted to figure out the mystery. I held onto the hope that the 3.4 seconds the tech caught a glimpse of the membrane was correct! That little bit of hope is all I really needed. I left the appointment feeling decently well about everything and that this OB dr would solve this minor mystery.
A few days later I had to return to the clinic for that wonderful 24 hour urinalysis. While I did pass… it was by a close margin. (I will be asking more questions about this at my upcoming OB appt.) Anyway, I was getting ready to head to the clinic and noticed a gal I have connected with via Facebook posted in a Momo Twins Group. She happens to be from Iowa, exact same weeks as myself, and comes to Des Moines for her specialist as that is the closest specialist to her! We were thrilled to be connected as we could really relate to each other and if we both go inpatient, we’ll keep each other sane! Well, her post was not what I expected to read. She had been to her scheduled appointment that morning and found out she lost Baby A. My heart broke. I got that stupid lump in my throat, you know- the one that you get when you’re watching The Notebook or Dear John. The one that you know if you let your guard down, even for a split second it will be water works spewing from your eyes. I quickly messaged her and found out that she had to travel to Minnesota the next day to decide what to do with Baby B. What??? Is this really how pregnancy goes? This is also her first pregnancy. It’s these questions that I have, that will have to wait until I meet my maker to ask! Until then, I’ll hang on to hope….
Once I got to the clinic, I dropped off my sample to the lab and took to closest elevator to the second floor. It was 4:30 p.m. and I had no appointment. The OBGYN lobby was oddly quiet. Only one other patient in their filling out some paperwork. I sat down at the ladies window and quickly told her that I had no appointment and I understand if they can’t get me in, but I am in first-time-mom-freak-out-mode and would really appreciate just hearing their heart beats. Just a quick doppler listen and I can jet out of here as fast as I flew in. She was very sweet, and very empathic. I explained what had just happened to the girl I met and she completely understood my mental state. Three minutes later a nurse called me, I went back and laid down. It did take a few minutes to get two different heart tones, but eventually the two nurses did succeed, I thanked them and away I went.
Isn’t it amazing…. Just a little bit of hope. A little bit of hope in things unseen can change you?? Unseen but not unfelt. I know I don’t have two monkey’s in my belly. I know an amazing God picked me to be these babies MOMMY! Can you believe that? Honestly, I question it. Maybe he should re-evaluate my resume’, but then again, who am I to question a God as mighty as ours? We can’t see God, but we can feel him. As much as I do get some panic moments, I really do feel amazing about his pregnancy. And I can’t say that is due to my fung shui style of house or how I go to my zen place and balance my chi…. Because I don’t do any of that. I truly believe this peace comes from God. He knows just when I need it, and helps remind me to have faith in the things unseen. If these little miracles don’t make it and He has other plans for them, it will break my heart, it will devastate me and tear me up inside; however, if that was His plan for these babies, then I have to have faith that some blessing will come from all of this, for us and those precious babies.
AUGUST 15, 2018
We had our first TTTS (Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome) test at the specialists office. The same sonographer had worked on me the last time I was there and I was glad to have her again...even though she is a Husker… I’ll let that slide. She told me that Dr Boulis will be the specialist that I will see at my next appointment after the anatomy scan. She was bound and determined to classify me before I left the office. She immediately started scanning for the membrane. About 3 minutes in I finally said, “so both babies are moving around right?” She apologized, “I’m sorry, yes, I should have started with that! Yes, both babies are moving around, I am just on the hunt for this membrane the OB’s office thought they saw.” That is the nice thing about this specialist office and the OB’s office, they all communicate and can see each others reports. The sonographer was well aware that I have been classified both momo and modi and that for proper planning of these miracles she wanted to get it determined. For the TTTS part of the scan she measures different parts of the baby for growth and specifically finds the bladder of each baby. Eventually she had another sonographer come in and try to scan for the membrane. Both ladies saw what the OB’s office scans had seen and they agreed that the so-called “membrane” was artifact. And that it did not go between the twins but around them. And finally, she brought in Dr Boulis, and he too agreed that we are mono mono twins. Oddly enough, even though that classification is higher risk, it is nice to know.
Dr Boulis now wants me to be scanned at the specialists office weekly, along with my OB care. At my 20 week appointment we will make plans for what the next month will look like. I’m guessing bi-weekly appointments with the specialist office for weeks 21-24/25. He also said inpatient will happen between weeks 24-26 for very close monitoring, and that we will be delivering at 32 weeks. 32 WEEKS!!! Can you believe that?? After the 24 week mark, if something happens while I’m inpatient they can take the babies via emergency C-section and they will be viable. They will have a rough road ahead being that small and premature, but the three of us plan to prove them all wrong. They’ll be staying put until 32 weeks and come out strong and healthy!
So, all-in-all yesterday was a good appointment. No TTTS threat at this point. Both babies weigh 8 ounces and are measuring 18 weeks, 3 days, which is 100 percent perfect! They did say the cords appear to already be crossed. This is the inevitable part about momo twins, cord entanglement, but Dr Boulis assured us that with close monitoring they can intervene and provide options for survival. Some not-so-fun options, but options nonetheless.